If they had asked me to write something of this caliber six years ago or even ten years ago, I would have seemed lost. I have never looked at life as if there was a future to think about, much less a legacy to leave behind. I was never a “How about tomorrow” kind of person, I was a “Just living for today” kind of person. .I grew up in a very strict family, no TV, no boys, no meat and no fun. It was work, work, work and more work, except for the occasional anger and drug use. My parents thought they were hiding it from us, but kids aren't stupid. My mother was an RN, my father a chef. People watching saw what my parents wanted them to see, travel everywhere during the summer, nice clothes, food on the table, and a Christmas tree that was always full. What no one saw was the hurt, pain and depression I suffered as a child growing up in this house. I remember when I was ten I wrote in my diary that I wanted a baby, so I could have someone to love and who would love me back. My mother found it and I was beaten badly, but no one explained the reason for that diary entry. I also remember that every time my parents argued they used us children as pawns to get back at each other. When my mother died I was with her when she took her last breath, I was actually the only one there. I was 11 years old, I thought that maybe things would get better, since they couldn't get any worse. Well I was wrong, my mother's death introduced me to a whole other world. I learned about boys, meat, TV and fun and, for a sheltered child, it wasn't a good combination all at once. I was clinically diagnosed with depression at 12 years old, because I tried to commit suicide on several occasions. My father was missing and... middle of paper... the pain I felt, but some things are out of my control. I realized that everything I went through I went through for a reason, it made me who I am. Now I'm planning my future and that of my children, I no longer live just for today. I want my children to have everything I may have missed and more. I decided to go back to school to show my teenage son the importance of a college education and that it doesn't have to stop at high school. I want to show my little girl how a woman should behave and what it means to be a woman. I want to be a great role model for my children. Life for me now is full of possibilities and opportunities. Now I wake up with a smile instead of a frown. I think my mother looked down on me and saw that I was heading for a dead end and brought my children into my life to show me that life was worth living..